Editor’s Note: This post first appeared November 18, 2010.
Negative connotations of sunglasses after dark:
1) Person is high
2) Person is blind
3) Person is a liar
4) Person is “trying to be cool.”
Albert Frank
1 Min Read
Looking through their eyes it was hard for me to walk as I judged my walk as stiff and “white” and hated myself. I saw myself through their eyes on the Football field Basketball court Baseball diamond Hell of high-school gym class stumbling around in…
Albert Frank
1 Min Read
She showed up last year with a group of drunken babies, hedonists and troubled look-at-me’s. She was plastered with all the Punk-rock concentrated jim-jams: Mohawk ripped fishnets combat boots bra through net-top facial tattoos plaid miniskirt bullet-belt Belladonna gap-tooth smile and shot through with stainless….
Albert Frank
1 Min Read
Mister Bunny was originally conceived in 2004 from a pillow-case and a few leather-jacket zippers. I guess I’ve been trying to perfect the creepy stuffed animal ever since.
Albert Frank
1 Min Read
In the summer of 1990 I attended the annual Chicago Comicon. I brought along Xeroxed copies of two finished stories to hand out to publishers. I ran into the Caliber Press table and met Gary Reed (publisher), and handed him the samples. One year later…
Albert Frank
13 Min Read
I work for the University of Texas, and it pays the bills. I could use more money but I’m not going to complain, things could be much worse, much more uncertain. I know because I’ve been there. I’ve had many, many jobs in my adult life. I’ve managed to whittle together a pretty seamless resume of 5 jobs, but the truth is much more entertaining. My actual resume would never get me a job, but it’s pretty interesting. Here are my jobs as follows;
Albert Frank
76 Min Read
My rental car stalls on a country backroad. I turn the key, and it chugs away helplessly. I get out and start walking down the gravel pathway. The sun is shining pleasantly. I soon see a small farmhouse in the distance. The grass along the road is tall, and amber colored, it whips along with the wind. Behind me, I can hear what sounds like rainfall, or popping corn, only faint, as if at a distance. I turn around and see the undulating blackness of a locust swarm. It was coming my way, like a filthy blanket…rolling.
Albert Frank
2 Min Read
Huge ragged holes open the knees of my jeans, deep crescents of shadow banding my spindly legs. Bulky engineer boots, comical fat-soled knob-toed Frankenstein feet sprouting from calves as thick as my forearms.
Toss on my leather jacket and trench coat on top. Its cold outside. West Texas cold. Fonzerelli scarecrow shivering in the darkness.
Footsteps echoing along the concrete walls of the underground parking lot. Sounds sharpened by the chill.
Albert Frank
1 Min Read
Hey, look at that ad. Cute girls in my area want to meet 42 year old men! What a coincidence, as I am 42 years old!
Albert Frank
2 Min Read
Negative connotations of sunglasses after dark:
1) Person is high
2) Person is blind
3) Person is a liar
4) Person is “trying to be cool.”
Albert Frank
1 Min Read
I was sixteen, and darkness had fallen and we’re riding our bikes. The boys I’m riding with turn onto 95th street and I follow even though we’re headed towards a white neighborhood. I figured we were going to turn around as the first set of…
Albert Frank
3 Min Read
(It’s one thing for a knockout brickhouse to make such specific demands for a husband as we see below, at least you’d have something to look at, but an overweight woman (this is Craigslist after all) that is too ugly to actually be captured on…
Albert Frank
2 Min Read
Note: the acronym (CMA) is a University Of Texas at Austin building name abbreviation for the College of Communication Building B Hey guy who draws on the elevator doors every day with his nose grease. I just thought I’d drop you a line and tell…
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